There are many definitions of the ego, from the one that says it’s something we build to identify ourselves as a person to the one that says it doesn’t really exist, and we shouldn’t pay attention to it.
Today, I want to share with you the one that makes the most sense to me, so you can form your own.
It’s clear that as human beings, we are always trying to define what surrounds us; these definitions allow us to know in order to understand.
For me, the ego is the definition we construct about ourselves to know and understand ourselves.
It is composed of beliefs about our abilities, attributes, our personality, our achievements, and even the things we buy.
This mental construct is dynamic and changes with life situations, for example: having success in a project makes you feel like a winner, while failures give you the illusion of being a loser. This is how this self-invented concept of yourself gets reinforced.
This changing and subjective nature is responsible for creating emotional tension and drama in our lives. One moment, you feel superhuman, and the next, you question whether life is worth living.
It is in this self-constructed image where most of our pain resides, where we encounter this inner voice that is constantly judging and trying to analyze all the things that happen or could happen.
At that moment, you believe that the voice in your head is yourself, and you begin to listen to it.
It's your ego talking when you believe:
- I’m not good at studying.
- I can’t achieve what I set out to do.
- No one loves me.
- I’m not good at thinking;
- I’m a bit dumb.
- I’m not worth it.
- Everyone else is foolish;
- I’m a superior being.
- You’ve accepted all these beliefs as true, and they are the ones that limit you and fill you with fear every day.
The ego is the way we define ourselves; sometimes, we exaggerate what we are, and other times, we diminish ourselves. – Ray Marfil.
A much more spiritual sense.
Your essence is pure love; therefore, your soul is made of that love. When we come to this world, we need a body to experience it, and along with our body, we also receive other tools that will allow us to live this learning experience: fear, attachment, ego, and our human condition in general.
I used to think that the body is like a means of transportation and that our spirit was completely independent of it.
However, now I understand that both are the same; your body, mind, and emotions are simply your spirit vibrating at denser frequencies, so we are pure love manifesting in different dimensions.
Since the ego is another tool that will help us experience our lessons in this life, it is also a slightly denser version of your essence. Therefore, ego and spirit are the same.
Repudiating it or wanting to eliminate it from your experience is like wanting to cut off an arm.
¿ Why then does it always seem to torment me?
Simple, because that’s its function, to create that imbalance so that we can understand the duality of this universe.
For example, every time you were selfish and took something from others, it was to help them with their own lessons like detachment and for you to recognize how bad you felt afterward, both significant lessons of love and respect.
In other words, every time you felt you were selfish towards others, every time you judged yourself. It was your spirit speaking to you through a denser language, teaching you about duality.
¿So, there's no difference between intuition and ego?
In essence, no, both originate from your spirit and are some of the ways it communicates with you and guides you through life.
However, in practice, there is a fundamental difference. Intuition provides messages closely aligned with the pure love of your soul; its guidance typically leads you on a path of unity with others and self-respect.
On the other hand, the ego will lead you down the opposite path, one of separation, primarily from yourself and others. Remember a couple of times when you were selfish, and surely the outcome included conflict, confusion, pain, and separation.
¿What do I do then to stop suffering the consequences of acting based on the ego?
I recommend observing. Practicing this active observation of your actions and thoughts will allow you to get to know it, and in the following instances, recognize it.
Observe your thoughts and emotions without judging them, as regardless of the channel they come through, they are messages from your spirit to guide you.
Practice self-compassion. On the journey of life, you will acquire a broader level of awareness that will allow you to observe more things. As you learn to love yourself more, you can choose which path to follow: the path of separation in the ego or the path of unity with intuition.
While this is happening, we will continue to learn lessons in both ways.
The path to reconciliation with the ego is through love, accepting that we need it for this experience. By being able to love it as any other part of your being, you can contemplate it more clearly.
Thus, you choose your path.
